This philosophical rumination of living like there is no tomorrow comes form Og Mandino’s “The greatest Salesman in the World”. It’s a great book, don’t get me wrong I have nothing but praise for it. Sure it was written in a different century and would require a lot of adjustments for inclusivity but it’s a good read when you pick and choose things that suit the modern world. And yet there was one thing that stuck out to me, and it’s not just this book’s fault, it’s just it reminded me of my discomfort while reading it. I think this thing persists throughout a lot of other books too, no way of knowing when it started, and I found long ago that I have an issue with that kind of thinking.
I am talking about living in this moment. Og Mandino gives a whole chapter to the idea of living as if there is no tomorrow. And he isn’t the only one who swears by this ideology, but I have an issue with this since I was first time pregnant.
Today I was pondering about it in the shower. My most loved place for good philosophy session because that’s where my kids leave me alone. And I thought that living in a moment is a very male idea. Just bear with me with this one. Male bodies don’t have any visible bodily processes that last longer than a few moments, half an hour at best (sorry for being cheeky). Females can be stuck with period bleeding in some cases for eight days. Some of them have terrible pains for the first two (which scientist already compared to the pain of having a heart attack). And let’s not forget the best one – 40 weeks of pregnancy.
Now the idea that let’s say at 12 weeks amid vomiting, swelling and all, a woman decides that she will live for the day as if there is no tomorrow. Can anyone imagine this kind of scenario? Or decides that instead of suffering period pains she will go and have a great day. And here I am talking very hypothetically and about healthy people, I know there are diseases in men too and they have to live with them. But all I am talking about is the ideal healthy natural environment where healthy men ejaculate (even if it’s an uncontrolled situation), women have periods and bare babies. To a pregnant woman there is nothing scarier than the thought that ‘there is no tomorrow’ on two occasions:
- one – she really wants to see that baby;
- two – she really wants it out of her body in due time.
If there is no tomorrow, none of these things are happening and that’s a scary today to be in.
You can say that we all are more than our bodies but unless you already found a way how to transfer our brains to androids, I’d suggest you see our bodies, mind, and soul as a whole. And that includes us relieving ourselves however holly and mindful we might be.
I don’t remember any mum ever saying to others – live like there is no tomorrow, take the best that you can!!! And on and on and on. Because a loving mum wants the best for her children, so today she is doing all her best for their tomorrow. How can you say to this woman that whatever you are doing must be pointless, because you should be having the best of today and not worrying about tomorrow? I know that tomorrow hasn’t happened yet, but I’d say that there is a 99% chance (if it’s a school week) that my kids will need a clean uniform tomorrow morning.
Just saying…
I know, I know, I am hyperbolising… but! Can’t we just stop with that no-tomorrow call? Because seriously, in most cases life is long enough to plan it and there is nothing wrong with it. I like the idea of being your best every day but not because there is no tomorrow. This idea must have some Christian roots in it too – that if you want to go to heaven be a good boy today.
It bothers me a little every time I see people using this as an excuse to change their lives. And I assure you that mothers, wives and kids of those men (in most cases) who decide to live for today and move in with mountain monks, still have a tomorrow to think about.
What would I replace it with? Have goals that fuel your todays. It’s a much better approach than thinking that there is no tomorrow. More so because Og Mandino himself talks about daily, weekly, monthly, yearly, life goals. So a bit of hypocritical of him, isn’t it? And I agree it’s a very nice way to say, and sounds very inspirational “What would you do if there was no tomorrow?”. Why would anyone think it’s a good idea to ask this question? Probably only those who have never been pregnant. Or had periods, at that.
Oh, he also offers to forget the past (and it’s not his idea just that his book got in a way of this thought process). But what good would come of that? I know he means the bad bits of the past. And yet he also asks us to learn from our failures. Again, too many ideas that don’t work together. Also, it’s a great recipe for disaster, because forgotten past is not a healed past. Might sound fancy to an entrepreneur with a failed deal but not to a sexual assault victim. Forcing yourself to forget is not equal to healing yourself.
I am not blaming Og Mandino’s book on anything, I know it’s inspirational and I would still recommend reading the book even if you don’t seek to be the greatest salesman in the world (with a grain of salt like with everything else in this world). I might have had similar thoughts at some time in my younger more moved self as well. All I am saying is that some of those ideas just sound good on paper. And sometimes when we find ourselves incapable of living for today, we blame ourselves (very much a thing in female gender) and think that we are weak. When in reality we are stronger when we plan for our tomorrows, and when we make them better than our yesterdays.
Peace.